Since the media decided not to report on the GIANT ZOMBIE TURKEY that was attacking West Virginia this week… it is up to us at Horseshoes and Hand Grenades to keep our fans informed! Er, a giant zombie turkey was attacking West Virgina this week. Stephen and I went head-to-head with this gobbling menace in an epic battle sure to go down in the finicky pages of history. The horrible fowl was made from the parts of five hundred dead thanksgiving dinners, and sewn together by the evil SUC! So, you see, it is truly not our faults that we were a few days late with the show… but the fault of the evil squirrel army and their dastardly turkey zombie of doom!

To make up for our sight delay (even though we were saving mankind from death by turkey), we made this show extra gnarly! We have the lyrics to “My Dear, My Penis is a Mountain” in Croatian, a drunk, naked man that did not want to be rescued, and an assault by deadly gravy. Hope your Thanksgivings were in-law free!

Factoid of the Week:
A common housefly beats its wings about 20,000 times per minute

UK’s oldest newlyweds
Mile High Crime Club
My Dear, My Penis is a Mountain
Man beaten for being bald
Drunk, Naked Man causes wrecks
Man Assaulted with Gravy
Because women love it when it gets in their hair 0_o
Old white women vacationing in Kenya for sex
The invasion continues
Paramedic shoots to kill… kinda
Woman Crashes through window… and gets her hair done

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Running Time: 1 Hour

Happy Turkey Day from the whole team here at Pi and CHiPS! Hope you guys stuff yourself stupid!

Thirty-three episodes down, and only one million catrillion baziollion to go! At least, we hope… because then we would be immortal, and that would be nice. Here at Horseshoes and Hand Grenades, we have been pumping out quality episodes since the dawn of time (ignore the fact that there was no podcasting when Jesus walked the earth), and we are proud to have you as listeners! Feel free to email us and tell us what you think about this week’s hilarious episode filled with a man marrying a dog, hookers for the disabled, getting high off poo, and bears stealing cars for SUC. (Viva la FUR!)

Factoid of the Week:
It takes about 3 1/2 hours for sound waves to travel from San Francisco to New York

Man Marries Dog<—Submitted by voodoosnowflakes
SOAPBOX! School bans Christmas cards!
Because sex is as important as breathing 0_o
Don’t watch pr0n in your CAR!
Airline security arrests infamous SALAD MAN!
Top 10 Things NOT to Shoot
Kids resort to huffing poo for a natural high <— Submitted by Frankie U.
Sex you can eat!
Pedophile employed at kindergarten!
Cows Flee After Seeing Micky DeeZ <— Submitted by VoodooSnowFlakes
Kid suspended for drawing “evil things” <—– Submitted by Frankie U
Bear steals car!

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Running Time: 1 Hour

So, Stephen was hyped up on coffee and I was sipping tea for this episode… and we all know what happens when caffeine combines with Horseshoes and Hand Grenades! At one point, I was pretty sure I was going to spit green tea all over my poor laptop, but thankfully I was able to compose myself and continue reading through our stories. Stephen and I found a lot of wacky stories this week including an eight-limbed toddler, a woman who bit her boyfriends lip OFF, a gorilla who was switched out for a stripper, and 2,500 gallons of liquefied hog poo. Ugh.

Toddler with EIGHT Limbs
Tunnels are boring
Destined to be alone?
The World has gone BANANAS!
Kid gets detention for hugging…enter the SOAPBOX!
This stuff never happened when I was in school
Bill of $0.00
Once bitten
2,500 gallons of spilt hog poo
Flying Cows
Dope arrested for possesion… of dope
Assault with a deadly….Frying Pan?!

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Running Time: 1 Hour

Man! The last few days have been intense! Stephen and I managed to rid our hometowns of the Zombie menace, but on a downside we couldn’t raise Demon Face to help host the show. Apparently, he was pissed because we didn’t do the show on Friday and he had a date with Satan’s daughter… Whatever, I hope it sucked. This show was amazingly hilarious. Stephen and I were both kind of tired from all the Zombie slaying, but it made us mega funny and slap happy. Good times! We’ve got Zombies passed out on trains, the final story on the infamous smoker leg, a man pooing in Micky Dee’s, and another man that beat up a dead body! This month has been insane, and we are stoked that you guys stick with us for every episode.

Factoid of the Week:
Sharks are immune to every disease…including Cancer

Aliens Set Fires In Italy
Zombies Don’t Drink!
Disappearing Sheep Show
Ketchup > Guns
The Great Pickle Caper!
More info on the LEG!
Bad Day^5
Man Poos in Mickey Dees
Dentists Dances
Kinky Knitwear
Invincible naked man runs loose in Super 8 Motel!
Crazy man beats the crap out of a dead body!

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Running Time: 1 Hour

Beware the three-headed monster! Adam of Tweek’d joins as a guest third host this week on To Be Named Later, and terror follows in his wake.  Brian and Will pick up the pieces in an NFL Midseason Special version of the show.  “Eight in the Box” and “Drawing Dead” return, where Will looks toward two NFL games in a bid to finally go 2-0.  The trio discuss this week’s NFL games and a variety of non-sports tangents.  We cannot say whether or not Adam gets tortured by an unnamed Patriots head coach.

Eight in the Box
-Georgia coach Richt apologizes for team TD celebration
-Florida State QB Lee suspended for two games for violating team rules
-Tulane sends conference video of controversial call
-Division III Trinity laterals 15 times on game winning play
-Sonics tell NBA about Oklahoma City plans
-Yankees hire Girardi as new manager
-Dodgers hire Torre as their new manager
-Hingis retires after cocaine accusations

Drawing Dead
-Cleveland favored over Seattle?
-Cincinnati favored over Buffalo?

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Running Time: 1 Hour